No sick person in this world wanted to face nasty doctors. When we get sick and we go to hospital, we are hoping to be treated with care. If the medicines doesn’t help us cure our illness, perhaps being cared and well treated will give us some motivation and positive vibration that will help us heal ourselves.
Why They Act This Way?
I didn’t blame doctors or nurses for being nasty, especially those who have to work long hours. It is true that when we didn’t get enough rest, we will get cranky. So that explains some of the doctors’ attitudes when they raise their voices at patients or when they speak directly without care about the patients’ feeling.
And I understand why some of the doctors act like they didn’t care. It could be one of their ways to get rid from being emotionally attach to the patient’s condition. Trust me; it is heavy to carry emotional bonding between doctor and patient.
Regardless the reasons are, I believe they (the doctors) shouldn’t say things that take away the motivation from the patients and the family members, and bring the negative energy surround the patients. (Our voices and tones project vibrations to the surrounding positively or negatively, depend on the way we speak about it emotionally)
The Nasty Doctor
Experiences like these happened in my life more than twice. It happened to me once and the rest of the events happened to others. When I experienced it, I didn’t feel good at all. What they doctor has said and the way he said it killed my motivation right away. When I walked out from his room, I was crying. I didn’t cry because I was in pain but I cried because he took away two things I have with me – motivation and hope. That happened to me in March 2011.
Last week when I was visiting my friend’s auntie, I overheard a group of doctors were talking about a cancer patient they treated. Once they finished discussed about the patient, the patient’s family member asked one of the doctor:
Patient’s Family Member: “Is she in pain?”
Doctor: “Of course-lah! She’s having cancer. Its all in her body now..Cancer in her stomach and bones and everywhere, of course she’s in pain. She will die!“
If you curious, he actually spoke that in local dialect and the last words actually sounds as “Dia akan mati punya!” And he rose his voice (but not shouting) to the family members. His tone showed that he was tired of explaining things like this to people. Perhaps he’s dealing with his frustration too.
I was standing in the same room when it happened. I tried to understand the reason for his act but something greater pulled me away. I looked at the family member who has asked the question. She was closing her mouth with both of her hands. I took that she was surprised and sad about the death thing.
The family members surely would have hurt, knowing for sure the love ones will die. What about the patient? Can she hear? What if she heard the doctor said – She Will Die? (As a matter of fact, they doctor referred her as she – like a person who didn’t exist…you get what I mean). What would she feel? Was her hope been taken away too?
Alright, who cares? So some doctors would have responded. Who cares about feelings? We are here to speak about sciences and medical. Fair enough. I would not expect doctors to speak about spirituality to the patients but I believe in this:-
If these doctors work with love, they would have chosen words that comfort everybody feelings including them (the doctors). Remember that when we give love, we get love.
The Loving Doctor
Earlier that day, I was in different hospital for my own medical check-up. The doctor who have been treated me since nearly two years ago was a great doctor. On that day I asked her how can I make things back to normal again? Her replied was simple “Think positive” and then she smiled.
Perhaps, from medical point of view, I have no chances to make things back to normal again but instead of pushing me away with her medical and science knowledge, she just suggested me the psychological way. She didn’t take her time to explain about positive thinking because she knows I knew it better. With her, I’ve got motivated. I felt hope surrounding me and I felt loved and appreciated as a human being.
I walked out from her room smiling and feeling cheerful about how things in my body are being partying over a year. I don’t feel sad about the truth from medical perspective. As long I have my motivation and hope with me, I’ll feel alive.
Work the Loving Way
It is true that death will come anyway. No matter how motivated they become, it still cannot defeat death. But we have to remember this too, that death is not in our hands. As long a person is breathing, he or she is entitled to be treated with care, hope and positiveness. If we can’t comfort the patient’s body or emotion, at least comfort his soul by prayer. Regardless what we belief in (science, medical, spiritual or UFOs), prayers is best treatment we could give to the patients. Doctors should have known this, or at least suggest it.
While I was comforting myself after I’ve heard “she will die”, I wish the conversation between the family member and the doctor be like this:
Patient’s Family Member: “Is she in pain?”
Doctor: “Medically your mother (or call the patient’s name) is very ill and in pain. Your mother may not survive the cancer and maybe her time is near. We try our best to reduce her pain but you need to get ready for the worst. The best we could suggest is send her prayers so it will help to comfort her”
It is not hurt to help people emotionally with love because this love will make sure you being loved and blessed as a doctor in many ways. Just a love and it will change the energy surrounding the patient and it will change your busy world spiritually, emotionally and physically.
Note: Condolences to the my friend and her family for the lost of their great loving auntie last Sunday.