How Ego Looks Like?

Ego; always appear big and smug. At least that’s how we portray an ego. Last month I’ve seen ego in different dress. Ego no longer appear big and smug, instead it appear like a child that need care from the mother. Sometimes it appears like a loving soul. And yesterday I’ve learn that ego has taken its place into a new level.

Ego can dress up in anything it wants. Often, we are fool by our own ego. It makes us feel good about ourselves and not about others. It always wants us to prove that we are right to others. In healing, healers who have not realize the existence of their ego when perform healing to others, will result as an ineffective healing. Beware of ego that comes with healing will create non-beneficial attachment between healer and the other person. Besides healing (in life generally), ego always make us feel stand out. No doubt ego has its positive role in personal development. However ego that appears in many dresses can be confusing and easily lead us to the situation we do not want.

Ego is good in acting too. It can appear as care, humble, self-control, self-defense and many more. The only way to know whether we didn’t act based on ego is to check out intention. Basic question to ask ourselves is “Am I trying to prove that I am right?”, because right or wrong is subjective whether it’s in the past, now and future. The answer will undress the ego and don’t be surprised that the actual appearance of the ego could be ignorance, arrogant or even selfish.

Whatever you do in life, always remember this; ego never looks ugly. That’s the reason we always put ego in front of us, even worst represent us. Ego best place is behind us, the place that could balance the strengths and the weaknesses that we have. Never place ego in front of us because we could be easily blinded by the beauty of it dresses and acts.

Beware of The Ego

Beware of The Ego

Five Powerful Cleansing Phrases

I wrote this statement in my Yahoo Messenger since two weeks ago and I got many responded from people in the list. Most of the respond were curious about my life. Only one asked me directly “What’s with the status?”

The status goes like this:

I love you. I forgive you. Please forgive me. I am sorry and Thank you.

I love when people curious about these phrases and I explained to them that these are cleansing phrases. These five phrases are commonly use in daily life but many do not aware that these phrases has cleansing power. It cleanses ourselves from the unnecessary thoughts that we restore inside our mind especially our subconscious minds. In another article, it says that:

“You clean yourself from subconscious garbage – programs that run your life without your participation”- Read more here.

This cleansing technique called Ho’oponopono, started in Hawaii, founded by Morrnah Nalamaku Simeon and documented for healing proof by Dr. Hew Len, her student.

How Ho’oponopono actually work?

Dr.Ihaleakala Hew Len

Dr.Ihaleakala Hew Len

Everything in our lives was partly created by us. The creation is not just with our hands and actions but also with our minds. Everything started with our minds. Take a quick moment and check out what were the last things we have in our minds? A world peace? A meal? A solution to confrontation? A gift for the lover? A happy family? A prepared dialogue for argument? Jealousy thoughts? These thoughts and many other thoughts were sent out to the Universe and in the creation process instantly.

According to Dr. Hew Len, who have managed to heal violence patients in Hawaii State Hospital described that he do not heal them, instead he healed part of himself that created them (the patients).

Ho’oponopono and Healing

I practice Ho’oponopono everyday especially at night. Sometimes I just do the cleansing generally but sometimes I specifically focus on a thing. When I dealt with my fear and anger, I specifically use Ho’oponopono to cleanse the relationship, the situation and myself that relate to fear and anger.  Over the time, it has helped me reduce the intensity that fear and anger have towards me. It also help me to cleanse the unnecessary thoughts of anger and fear in this now moment (that I might now aware of it), so it would not emerge uncontrollably in my reality later.

When a person takes responsibility in his creation and aware that as a human, he would not be able to run away from destructive thoughts, Ho’oponopono is one of the best cleansing techniques a human could give to himself and to the rest of the world.

And here’s the best part of Ho’oponopono, it didn’t require meditation or specific ritual to cleanse our minds. It also didn’t tie to any religion specifically. These five phrases can be used anywhere, everywhere, to any situation we like, to people we love or dislike and use it for love. All we need to do is to repeat these phrases many times (many times = mantra).

  • I love you
  • I forgive you
  • Please forgive me
  • I am sorry
  • Thank you

Five beautiful phrases and yet contains powerful love and cleansing materials. Take responsibility that we are creating the life and the world. Put our egos aside, surrender ourselves to God and cleanse ourselves with love. Last, belief that the world and life that comes to us would be better, beautiful and cleaner than before.

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Some practice indicated that only four phrases require for cleansing (all above except I forgive you) but some practice indicated that I forgive you is one of the cleansing too, especially in cleansing our egos.

Hooponopono Cleansing

Hooponopono Cleansing

The Power of Wishes – Part 1

In the previous article, I have mentioned about words that creating our lives. Today, I would like to share my experiences on wishes. I am a human too; therefore I did make mistakes in turning my words into wishes. Allow me to picture the mistakes I made, so you would avoid the same mistake in life.

Every human have been granted with freewill, including freewill of wishes. If we realize, it all started with wishes. I wish to be richer, I wish I could take itI want to be richerI want to take it and many more wishes. Either we use the word “wish” or “want”, we already wishing for it. Remember that “we create as we speak”, every wish we made, and we are creating it. It just a matter of time for our wishes to turn into reality. How good is that? Well, it is good if we wish for the great things. But what about those negative things we accidentally wish into our lives? This happened to me last week, anger and bad wish.

It is not easy to face anger especially when we are alone. I felt it came to me and it came quick. No matter how much I prepared myself to tango with my own anger, I slipped. When we get angry, we tend to say things we didn’t mean to say. Not just that, people who get angry always ask to be leave alone. To say it is already bad, to know it’s happening for real is even worst.

I just want to be alone

I just want to be alone

That’s what I did last week. I asked silently inside my head “I just want to be alone”. As promised that everything is in creating process right now, the moment I asked to be alone was the moment everything I love to be with was slowly taken away from me indirectly. I have to say indirectly because what was taken might not necessarily in human form. It could be situation we love the most, relationships or something symbolic to us. The best example is losing support from the people who always support us. However, to realize these smallest changes in life is not everybody’s favourite. In fact, many people only realize the changes in life when something relate to it pop up as a problem. If I have not conscious enough, I would not realize the changes too.

The moment I asked to be alone, everything that I was close with (emotionally, spiritually and mentally) was slowly walked away from me. The first thing that walked away from me was the emotional support from my best friend. Knowing her for many years and she never fails me. However, that day was different. When I asked her for help, she refused to help me. Here’s the weirdest part, she gave me hint to deal with my situation alone and there’s no need for her to help me. She left me alone in a car for more than 30 minutes and she was not that kind of person.

More things happened after that. My other two best-friends were supposed to have lunch with me and they were late. Even if they were late before, they will text. But last week was totally different. They seem like ‘don’t care’ anymore. We end up have our lunches separately.

The last thing that happened completely knocks my head and realized that I had wish for something I do not want. It was my ring and I lost it like a magic. The ring represents symbolic life to me. I was cleaning my hands with a wet tissue and poof! …the ring was missing. I realized it was there and in split seconds it was gone. From that moment I asked myself “What have I wished?”

It took me less than an hour to figure out the mess. The first thing I do was Ho’oponopono cleansing. I gave love and thanked the situation for the service and experience it gave me. Then I rephrased my wishes. I said “I am grateful that I have my family and my friends, I am with them and I am with love. My ring is in my bag”. I repeated it many times for an hour.

Three hours later, I slowly searched for the ring again in my bag. Suddenly my hand felt something solid. It is my ring and it was nicely wrapped with dry tissue. Magical isn’t it? Well it is a magic if you wish to see it that way. Later that evening, my best friends and I gather together and I told them about the wishes. They were sorry for things that happened but it was not their fault. I asked for it. The time them being late or when one refused to help me was the time I asked to be alone. Life is fair. God is even fairer.

The lesson is simple, careful for what we wish for.

In the situation where we get angry, calm down before we make our wishes. Avoid ask yourself to be alone or ask people to leave you. Instead wish for the space to calm down. The simplest example is:

“I need a space so I could feel the space with love”.

When we ask for this, we are asking God to share love with us in order to help us taking care the anger. Love, no doubt will help us reduce the anger too. Not just that, people who appear in our life at that moment of anger are people who could help us growth love and reduce anger.

It is important to know that it always never too late when it comes to create a wish. So, let’s rephrase our wishes and turn our lives into something positive and loving because we do have the power to change.

How to Cleanse Jealousy?

I wrote about jealousy yesterday and how to say love to overcome the moment of jealousy. The technique I wrote yesterday applies to ‘now moment of jealousy’. By giving love, it would instantly pressing down the jealousy bar at that moment. It save a person from giving negative energy to himself and to the person or situation that he feels jealous about. And jealousy that he felt a moment ago stop right there.

But what about his history of jealousy? What about the situation or people he felt jealous a year ago or 10 years ago? Every moments of jealousy that we have, especially moments that bring us great intense of feeling has its own curse on us. We may not know how the curse works on us but soon or later we will start to feel unhealthy, stressful and discomfort of emotions.

I knew a woman who lives her life with jealousy. Every time I was around her, I felt headache. I do not know how she gave me headache until I understand energy. From time to time I heard she fall sick, from Cysts to Hypertension and more. Recently I heard she had alternative medical treatment and she had removed ‘curses’ out from her body. Her health started to improve and she feels calm these days. Most important thing is she started to show love towards people around her.

In her case, she took years to realize curses she developed inside her. She had to learn the hard ways but we don’t. We could learn from her. I’ve learned about Jealousy and Curses from a lovely healer. She helped me heal from certain energies and she taught me about the disaster power of jealousy. Later on, I heard more the curses and jealousy from other healers and strangers. With all the knowledge I knew, I would like to share with you on how we should remove the past moments of jealousy.

  • Get Rid of the Dirt With Soap

    Get Rid of the Dirt With Soap

    Choose a moment to do this simple ritual.

  • Sit on a chair and feet touch the ground.
  • Close your eyes and close your palms.
  • Recalling the moments of jealousy you used to have before.
  • Draw (move) these moments from your mind into your palms. (This is an act of relocating the jealousy moments from your mind into a place where you have control over it, which are your hands).
  • Once all the moments of jealousy moved into your palms, open your eyes.
  • Go to the washroom and throw all these moments into a toilet bowl – Do it like your hands are full of dirt.
  • When it’s done, flush it away. Say thank you to these moments for the service and lessons they teach you. (This is an act of removing the moments of jealousy away from you…and with a love manner).
  • Wash your hands with soap. (This is an act of total cleaning your hands from dirt of jealousy).

Last, when one has been removed from your life, one has to be replaced into your life. When you remove jealousy out from your life, replace it back with love. Take a short moment to say prayers, forgiveness and love to yourself, to the people and situation you used to feel jealousy to. This will help you balance your life back and grow love from within.

Note: Some curses need healers to remove it out from the body. If you are sure that you have curses in you, please seek help from healers. 

Practice Forgiveness

Forgiveness is part of loving act and yet it is the hardest thing for many people. When we are in between forgiveness and our egos, we tend to choose egos. What happen when we do not forgive?

Forgiveness is like cutting the strings that attached us to an unnecessary object. When we didn’t cut the strings, where ever we go, we have to pull the object and its weight with us. The unnecessary weights always slow us down, and soon drained out our energy. Not to mention, along the way, we will add more weights and objects behind us. The heavier it be, the unproductive we became.

Forgive is Love.

Forgive is Love

Forgiveness is not easy. It takes practice to forgive. It takes courage to cut the strings. I always suggest practice forgiveness on small matters. Practice it daily. Here some examples. Always starts with yourself, family and then people around you including your neighbours and people in the office.

With own-self:
a) Forgive the madness you can’t take.
b) Forgive for the anger you threw today.
c) Forgive for the failures you made.

The reason is simple; we human are made to express our emotions and make mistakes. So don’t be too hard on ourselves. Forgive ourselves so we could move on and start another new day tomorrow. Forgive ourselves is loving ourselves.

With Family:
a) Forgive your husband for keep forgetting the groceries you ordered.
b) Forgive your kids for the mess they made.
c) Forgive your in-laws for the nagging.

People in the family are the closest people we connected to. It is easier to growth intense connection with our families. Forgiveness will help them and we break the intense chain. Forgiveness is one of the key to a happy family.

Your neighbours and people in the office:
a) Forgive your staffs for the mistakes they made. In case of frequent delay, instead of bragging about it, find out why they delaying it.
b) Forgive your boss about his bossy attitude. Forgiveness helps you move up faster or help you out (from the organization) faster.
c) Forgive your colleagues for the gossips they spread.
d) Forgive your neighbour for the loud music they played.
e) Forgive your neighbour for taking up your parking space.

Find solutions to each problem. Forgiving didn’t mean you have to turn your back, walk away and pretend nothing has happened. That’s not forgiving, that’s self-centred. In order to forgive, we must face the situations, the emotions and the solutions.

Forgive so we could growth love to ourselves and others. Forgive so others could have chance to spread love to us. Forgive and walk light in our lives.

Breaking Up – Why and The Healing.

Question:

Breaking up from a relationship is painful. What are the best things can be done to heal? Should we try to get back together? Can love growth again after brake up?

Answer:

Yes breaking up is painful but sometimes it could be just the surface of the emotion. Not all breaks up cases are painful to the three elements (mind, emotion and soul). Understand that relationship is not just physical and emotion connection between two people but also soul connection between two souls. It hurts for the physical and emotional being when two people are breaking up but it may not hurt the soul being. This however, depends on the reason for breaking up.

Sometimes break up helps to restore the harmony between two souls. When the relationship is creating gap and the only things that filling the gap is argument, hate, anger, frustration, then break up probably the good thing to do.

If one of the soul change his/her course of love, break up is the best thing to save self from prolonged pain

If one of the soul change his/her course of love, break up is the best thing to save self from prolonged pain

First we have to understand why we are breaking up and what can be the goodness we get from it. I experienced a case where a couple who were married for two years find themselves cursing each other every day and creating more agony than happiness. When both of them choose not to give up their ego and growth love in their marriage, break up is the only way to save their emotions and friendship. However, they remained for another year and they end up divorced in the ugliest way. The result was a war between these two souls. It takes them years to forgive each other. They could save their souls from the pain if they allow breaks up when they are still in state of respect to each other. This is the goodness that many people missed when they see break up is bad decision to make.

My advice is not to let both souls (you and him) go to that path of anger and hate. If a couple believe that happiness and love is still in the relation, then work something out to growth the love back. Love and happiness is not just a belief. It’s a work, progress and action.

Constructive Solution:

Should we try to get back together?

This will always be the best thing to do but with a condition: both of you must let go the ego and the past first. These two elements could block your love from growing again. Love taste best when both couple living in NOW moments and not the past.

Can love growth again after brake up? 

Loves always growth. Love is already in us. If we allow it to growth, it wills growth. Forgiveness is the best act that helps love growth. Forgive yourself for the things that happened. Forgive him for the things that happened. Then move on and love again.

What are the best things can be done to heal? 

  1. Forgive.
  2. Stay in the state of love especially to yourself. Give love to all the things around you and you will get love back. This act is to avoid anger, hate and despair taking over your emotion.
  3. Do things you never have chances to do before. Find yourself back from the activities you desire to do.
  4. Belief that only time, love and your effort to heal will heal you.
Conclusion:
Break up not always a bad decision. Sometimes break up is the best thing to save self from prolonged pain. See the whole situation in the bigger picture and decide if break up is good or bad for both souls. That would help both souls stay connect and respect each other. Most important it save self from anger and hate.

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If you have problems and you don’t have the solution, ask Ladyroses for help.

The Beauty of Help

Help is simply means giving. Help is the fastest way to build relationship between yourself and others.  Helping others is like building the bridge that connects us to the things we like and we want.

Here’s are the beauties of helping others regardless human, animals or the rest of the world.

  1. If you help people achieve their dreams, your dream runs to you.
  2. If you help people walk out from poverty, wealth will storm into your life.
  3. If you help people overcome their fear with love, braveness is your legacy.
  4. If you help people understand the value of forgiveness, hate stays away from you.
  5. If you help people find love, love will always find you.
  6. If you help people outgrowth happiness in their lives, happiness is growing a life in you.
  7. If you help people build success from their failures, success growth from your failures.
  8. If you help people and environment stay clean, beauty and health live in you.
  9. If you help people expand their knowledge, knowledge is expanding in your mind.
  10. If you help people find lights, darkness stays absent from your life.

There are always opportunities to help people, animal and the rest of the world around you. So give help to whoever you can without question their backgrounds, colours, mentalities and personalities because help is also means giving love to the world.

Hand Reaching for Hand