So Long My Old Man

Recently I asked my body to show me what to heal. A few days later, I began the week of provocation and fighter with tears. It happened out of nowhere and spontaneous. I had a thought about my late dad and a realisation that how deep I was conditioned by him. That realisation alone made me weep.

To write this will open up pieces of me to the world. I believe it’s time to bring it out to the Light. I seldom think of him but yesterday, his memory felt so alive. I knew it’s time to heal our Souls. Therefore, I would appreciate if you read this with compassion and feel no pity whatsoever towards our relationship. Remember that all of us are the product of conditioning and every journey is the sacred ones. So here we go.

I rarely speak about him. I don’t think of him as much as I think of my late mother. But yesterday, I saw a pattern. With him, I learned to fight; fight to be me, fight to get what I want, fight for love. All kind of fights. With him, I always wondered why I don’t feel so much love from him.

 
He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not.

Don’t get me wrong. He loved me but I don’t feel it. He was not a person of words. I remember asking him if he could carry me, he replied “And then throw you out of the balcony. Sure”. That response made me so happy. We ride an old bike around the island together. He took me to Chinese Kopitiam for breakfast. Sometimes I love to listen to his war stories; he was a soldier in WW2 and then fought with communists in the 60s. I learned to cook because of him. He was a great critic of my cooking.

Oh, I love those moments. Basically, I love if I could get attention from him but he loved not giving me one :D.

I didn’t cry when I saw him on his deathbed. He stared at me as if he knew he will leave. When he died, everyone wanted me to remove all the tubes from his body. They said only I could do it. I don’t know what I suppose to do but I did it anyway out of respect for him, without shed any tears. And I stopped cooking for years after he passed away.

 
A Wonderful Closure.

Sometimes we don’t know what kind of wound we keep inside of our system. If we didn’t ask to be healed, it will stay hidden in the dark. That probably why I never thought of him. The memories itself was in the dark. But when we are ready to heal, in all level, the Light will find its way to shine in the dark. The healing will flow in an unexpected way.

Yesterday felt like a huge closure for both of us. I have not wept for quite sometimes and it felt so damn good! The experience was like having a wild river flow through me. I felt so much lighter and so much gratitude for the healing.

 
What’s His Human Design?

And I ready to check his Human Design chart (another realisation). I don’t have the exact time yet so this going to be just a guess. I found out that he was either a Manifestor or an MG, with either Right Angle Cross of Consciousness or Juxaposition Cross of Experience. I’m still reflecting our past together so I could find realisations and then heal both of our souls.

If he was a Manifestor and I’m a Projector, that made a lot of sense 🙂

So long my old Man. May you find Peace, Love and Light Ayah, wherever you are ❤️

 

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Why Employees Experience Anxiety?

If you look closely, Anxiety doesn’t just happen in individuals. It also happens in corporate and organisation. Employers and employees have to take the pressure and without knowing how their body works, the Anxiety will become personalised and individual. Many employees feel left out and think the anxiety and pressure they feel are individuals and therefore, give up their careers.

Think again, how many people feel anxious at work these days? It’s not the work. It’s how each individual takes the pressure based on their body and energetic system. If they are not trained to take the pressure correctly, anxiety will be an illness instead of a pressure to deliver.

Right people for the right tasks is important to ensure the growth in any businesses. On top of that, training to manage the pressure can ensure the wellbeing of these people who help run the business and organisation.

You can send your employees to me for Anxiety, Nervousness and Stress Management Training. If you interested, please message me for more information.

Why you should not hide behind your anxiety

Do not hide behind the anxiety and depression because if we do that, we allow them to be our face and our identity.

Do not take the anxiety and depression as our enemy. Doing so will cause fights and wars between us and the energies.

And I can’t tell you to love them because that is not an easy work to do.

What I can tell you is Love Our Self First. Start with gathering our strength and courage. And slowly claim our Light. Learn to show compassion to ourselves even when we feel vulnerable. Respect our body. Say good things about us. Protect our sacredness. Reach out for help. Honour our journey.

When we love ourselves long enough, the essence of Love within us will eventually heal all pain that we endured. That’s what Love do. It heals all pain. Our job is to know how to Love and there’s only one place to begin; Our Self.

Most of the Time

I wanna wrap today’s experience in four words – Most of the Time.

Most of the time, we have no clue of our potentials.
Most of the time, we ignore our birthrights.
Most of the time, we are confused and in doubts with our existence.
Most of the time, we chase the reflection of others.
Most of the time, we look at the shadows and say “that’s who I am”.
Most of the time, it gives us anxiety and stress and depression.
Most of the time, we are unseen, unrecognised.
Most of the time, we have no clue why we are here.
Most of the time, we lost our way in this so called Life.

Most-of-the-time shall STOP now.

Story of a Chair

Everything that we see in this Life has a story. If we listen and acknowledge their presence, we might know what lies underneath their surface. This is a story of a chair.

The chair that you see in the picture has many stories of love, joy, sadness and pain. That beautiful chair used to be a seating place for an old man who had dementia. A lady who witnessed fragments of his life told me “That’s where my master used to sit”. A visitor who saw the chair said: “It’s for the King”. And each story has values.

If the chair could speak, it will speak a language of Love. It probably says “Sit with me so I can fulfil my purpose as a chair”. It would welcome anyone to fill its purpose. And it will listen to all of our stories of joy, love and pain; without judgement. That’s a pure Love.

These days I sit on it and observe the world out there.

All Life has a story. All Life has something to share. And all stories has values to be acknowledged. The stories will be told in many ways. We just need to listen to them.

 

Know Your Dance

Sometimes it seems like Life hit us hard. But the Truth is beyond what we see. Look at how the raindrops hit the flower again and again. It seems hard, but if we observe this dance, we see each drop hits the flower gracefully. The flower did not break, and the raindrops did not die.

Everything flow and dance on its steps. And this is how the rains and flowers dance together. Know our steps and uniqueness. And when Life asks us to dance, we shall do it beautifully!

Note: I recorded the video in slow motion, but I’m not sure if the video will be played in slow motion. I hope it does.

Sometimes it seems like Life hit us hard. But the Truth is beyond what we see. Look at how the raindrops hit the flower again and again. It seems hard, but if we observe this dance, we see each drop hits the flower gracefully. The flower did not break, and the raindrops did not die. Everything flow and dance on its steps. And this is how the rains and flowers dance together. Know our steps and uniqueness. And when Life asks us to dance, we shall do it beautifully! Note: I recorded the video in slow motion, but I'm not sure if the video will be played in slow motion. I hope it does. #motivation #mondaymotivation #lifelessons #lifecoach #lifecoaching #humandesignprojector #humandesign #awareness #spirituality #wisdom #awakening #dontgiveup #loveyourself #graceful #nature #rain

A post shared by Rose Osman (@yourpersonalmotivator) on

Can we know ourselves through Emptiness?

Emptiness; we always perceived it as pain. Perhaps what we really feel is an unknown feeling to the mind. It is a void that we never explore. And often we fill the void with something or someone. After all, Emptiness is designed to motivate us to seek for something or somebody to fill the space. With Emptiness, we desire for the Wholeness.

We never actually explore Emptiness and understand it for what it Is.

What if Emptiness is an unknown that has many potentials to grasp?

What if Emptiness is not a pain but a sense of longing for Oneness?

What if Emptiness is our formless side that we never get to know?

What if Emptiness is a magnet that pulls us on the right path?

What if Emptiness is an indicator that Life is changing the course?

What happens if we embrace Emptiness like embrace Love?

Can we know ourselves through Emptiness? If Emptiness made us seek for external fulfilment, it could also make us look for inner fulfilment. Why not try to sit with the feeling and find out what it wants us to explore?

Photo note: That’s the floor marker I used during video shootings, and I stand behind the Rainbow.

Are You Ready to Forgive?

Forgiveness Means:

1. A state of Awareness that between pain and freedom You choose Freedom.

2. Let Go the attachment you have with the pain.

3. Space you willing to give yourself so the body, mind, and Soul can heal from the pain.

4. A willingness to Love your Self again.

5. Respect you ready to give to your body and your entire existence.

6. A transformation from self-judgement into Acceptance.

7. Shifting your energy from ‘I’m the victim.’ to ‘I Am Claiming My Power.’ Forgive yourself first, and the Love you have will naturally forgive every pain in the world.

Note: An article headline on Waves Lifestyle front page (The Iskandarian newspaper) – issue April 2015

Why do We Need to be Conscious of Our Emotions?

Emotions are a new form of Awareness. With emotions, we become aware of vibration and waves of Life. Emotional Awareness is powerful because when we feel emotions, it is the entire body feeling it.

While Mental Awareness gives us a sense of understanding and reflection of Life, Emotional Awareness gives us moments of Life as a human. We are not entirely complete until we acknowledge our feelings.

Have you notice this? Try to feel Love and our bodies want to dance or kiss. Try to feel hate, and our bodies want to destroy whatever that we hate.

When we become aware of our emotions, Life becomes more colourful, and our sense of connection with Life becomes more vivid. Emotional Awareness also opens the door of Acceptance of ourselves and others.

Be conscious of emotions will take us to understand all spectrum of emotions. With understanding, we will know why there are hatred and compassion swing on the same momentum, and why sadness and happiness are the same peak and valley.

Be like a Tree

How do we stop fighting Anxiety and let the force flow through the body without we lose our sense of Self and Awareness?

The answer is; be like a Tree.

In my course, I explained how Anxiety associated with movements. It is designed to move (e.g. fight or flight). If you could observe, you will see that people who have Anxiety hardly sit still. The energy makes us move; often against the flow. And fighting the flow of anxiety is like swimming against the tide.

If you look at the trees, they are Still, and yet the branches and leaves move with the wind. If the branches and leaves fight the wind, it breaks. If we fight Anxiety, we break too because the force of Anxiety is great.

In the present of Anxiety, find your centre of Awareness and be still. Breathe and let the Anxiety flow as it is. If you have to move, do it consciously. If you are dealing with Sacred Anxiety or psychology Anxiety, none movement helps strengthen your sense of Awareness. And through your Awareness, you will feel the courage to face Anxiety with peace and compassion.