Grief – Who We Actually Miss?

Last night we talked about Grief. There were noises in the background, but it subsided to almost silent during the conversation. We pondered about grief; why the feeling is heavy and why sometimes we grief over someone who is not even in our inner circle.At that moment, I realised we have the same grief. I lost a friend in December 2016 and I grief till today. The grief is small and sometimes subtle. I know it’s a grief because I would stare deep into my inner space and try to fill the emptiness. Most of the time, the mind is occupied by self-guilt, but space remain empty.I love taking photos of empty chairs. It gives me the sense of space; the same space I’m staring into. Imagine those people who sat on these chairs during the day and they left during the night. If this is how death looks like, what are we missing here?During the conversation, this came out right from my lips. “What we miss is their presence (physical) and now it just an empty space”. We don’t connect much with Souls. We are a physical creature. Physical presence, the body itself make so much difference in this world. That’s what we missed. The rest come and go together with the body including the expression of love, the voice, the touch, everything about the body.That’s the most torturing feeling about grief’; longing for the body to be around. However, if we take grief with a touch of Spirituality, we would understand that Space is never Empty. The presence is always there. The essence of the energy body is right there. It’s just they appeared in a different form.Whenever I see empty chairs, I feel a deep sense of Peace and I would capture the moments through the lens. It’s okay to grieve. I no longer shed tears over her passing. I don’t think I even have tears to grieve. All I do is accepting the space I feel whenever I think of her.

That space is Love. I wish her Peace, wherever she is now.

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The Glimpse of Inner Peace in the Speck of Dusts.

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Do you want to know how does Being in the Now feels like? Thanks to cinematography, we can catch the glimpse of how being in the Now looks like. Before that, I want you to understand three things.

  • First, whatever that you see in the movies, that is just a tiny glimpse of eternity. Movies can only narrow down specific aspect of the Now but it can never replace the actually feeling of being in the Now.
  • Second, most of the movies take us away from the Now. It drawn at least two of our senses (sight and hearing) away from being aware of the Now. However, there are movies that carry the message of Being in the Now and I’m going to name one of the movie.
  • Third, you may want to consider that The Now is not entirely time base. And it is not a concept too. The Now is the door to Inner Peace.

If you read the book The Power of Now, then this is easy for you to grasp the essence of being Presence totally in the Now. Slowly it is not difficult for you to taste the glimpse of Inner Peace. However, if you haven’t read this book, then you can mentally understand The Now through certain movies.

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Microscopic of Dusts on the Big Screen.

Do you remember a movie called After Earth? There’s a scene where Kitai (played by Jaden Smith) lied down on the ground and facing his fear. He then became so presence in the moment where his fear dissolved, and his awareness are able to focus on little things like dusts floating in the air. The dusts are so vividly dancing in the air. The color (if I remember correctly) were gloomy and yet the cinematography brought up the moment of peace through Kitai’s breathing.

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And that’s the part I remembered because it gives the glimpse of inner peace. And I could say that because when we are in the Now moments, everything we see, touch, hear, smell and taste become vividly alive. That aliveness is Inner Peace.

Although what we see in the movie may not even accurately portray ‘moment of now’, but intellectually we see the fragment of Inner peace and also the glimpse of living without fear.

Fear Cannot Survive in the Now.

Why are we relating fear with being in the Now? In the After Earth, the reason Ursa cannot sense the presence of General Cypher Raige (played by Will Smith) is because Cypher Raige is being totally presence in the Now where fear in this system is dissolved.

Whether we realise it or not, we are caught in a web of fear; mostly created through our mind. That increases the state of anxiety in us. To reduce the anxiety is to reduce the mental fear. It takes practise to face fear by being in the now. This can be done by shifting our focus to our body and breathe the moment. This can be the most boring activity to our mind but not to our Awareness, certainly not to our body. This is also a form of meditation.

Remember that fear cannot consume you when you are fully presence. Fear cannot kill you when you are at peace with your Self. Anxiety is a by-product of mental fear. Therefore, don’t fight the anxiety. Don’t fight the fear too. Instead be gentle to what you feel and be presence in feeling the fear.

I’ve been practising to be in the Now moment from time to time. All I can say is, fear is not longer a mental torture for me. Instead, fear serve its purpose for my survival in the correct way. I enjoy my moments where I can feel the aliveness in the blades of grass, the dancing dusts in the air and many more.

If you want to experience Aliveness, Joy and Inner Peace, the only way to do it is to be presence in the Now. If you think the glimpse of Inner Peace in After Earth looked stunning and beautiful, wait until you experience the real Inner Peace in you.

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You can find the original post in my Steemit account.