Worth Every Step!

Yesterday my weight reduced to 59.5kg. That’s my latest target weight. Finally, my weight reached below 60kg. 5 months in WildFit, I have lost 10kgs and more than 84cm in total measurement.

The best part is WildFit helps me improved my hormone circulation. At this point, I no longer have to take synthetic progesterone every 3 months to induce menstrual cycle.

Like I stated in my other posts, healing takes time. What I’m healing from is not just the body but emotional healing too. Food is one great source of healing. Eating in seasons attuned me to nature, opened up my awareness of the season cycle in my body and outside my body. I feel blessed that I have consistent support from Dr. Tay Ju Lee and the WildFit team. She did great work in WildFit.

So far, I Am Grateful for the progress. The long sleeves that I’m wearing today belong to Joe! I asked her permission to try and see if I can fit in her size. There you go! She is a size S.

My next target is 58kg. Right now losing weight is not my main goal. At this point, I’m doing it for fun!

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If you like my post and the photo-stories, you can Buy Me a Coffee at https://ko-fi.com/roseosman. It will be spent on educations fees and books.  Thank you for supporting me on this journey.


Human Design: Projector – The New Leaders.

Projectors! It’s time to claim your power.

Human Design Experience and Human Design Malaysia are going to do 2 days mini-course about Projector and their gift as a leader.

Your Aura speaks more accurately about you than your mind. Ra described that, as Projectors, our aura is our business card.

How well do you trust your aura? Are you ready to guide others who are waiting in your fractal?

One of the subject we will talk in this 2 days (over 2 weekends) is effective communication as Projectors. We also will explore the aspect of relationship as Projectors.

Come and join us for 2 days mini-course on Projectors. You can PM us for more info or visit our website to reserve your seat. The mini-course is via live online classes:


“When a Projector goes into somebody’s aura, they tap into the aura field, not the person. Not the person’s identity, per se. They tap into that larger self, which is why they can handle the conditioning.

The thing is that if they’re not operating correctly, if they haven’t entered into whatever the generic experience is by invitation, then they can be and will be drawn away from their motivation. And when they don’t see correctly you’re killing a Projector. You might as well put them out to pasture and forget it” – Ra Uru Hu

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If you like my post and the photo-stories, you can Buy Me a Coffee at https://ko-fi.com/roseosman. It will be spent on educations fees and books.  Thank you for supporting me on this journey.

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#humandesignprojector #humandesign #humandesignmalaysia#splenicauthority #lifecoaching #人类图 #人類圖 #马来西亚人类图 #馬來西亞人類圖 #Suriname

90 days of Wildfit Challenge.

Final Results.

text15.png7 days ago was the last day for my 90 days of WildFit Challenge. I’m impressed with the way my body is making the progress. Since my Authority is Splenic, everything is about my body consciousness. There were countless of damages I did to this body through food.

WildFit provides me with the opportunity to heal and to decondition from food and emotional eating. And the best part is, WildFit trains me to be aware of the foods and the seasons.

Last night during our zoom call, IshKiia asked how much total loss that I experienced. Here’s the result.

I’ve lost a total of 84.09 cm (33.11 inches). The biggest loss is the fat on my hips from 138 cm down to 98 cm. Total KG loss is 6 kg (from 68 to 62 kg). I was told that it is okay to lose more inches than weight. I Am Grateful for that too because to lose inches means the body is cycling out the old fat and toxin.

WildFit is not a diet program. From my experience, it’s a spiritual and healing program for the body through food. WildFit certainly enhances my state of awareness towards food and the food industry. My biggest gain is the gift to look at coconut rice and not feeling a deep emotional craving to it. That’s freedom!

Again, I Am so Grateful for the journey. And Thank you for the support given by Dr. Tay Ju LeeIshKiia and the rest of the group. They are the best!

Photo 1-2: Wildfit results.
Photo 3: Before Wildfit, weight was around 68-69 kg.
Photo 4: Taken in 2017 with a weight ranging between 69-70 kg.

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If you like my post and the photo-stories, you can Buy Me a Coffee at https://ko-fi.com/roseosman. It will be spent on educations fees and books.  Thank you for supporting me on this journey.

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Human Design – Coffee,Coffee,Coffee…

That’s not my coffee!

I didn’t have my coffee for 6 weeks (I guess). Surely it’s been more than a month. At one point, I did take a tiny sip from a non-sugar long black to make my mouth bitter after I ate a cooked salmon.

You know what’s funny, I’m not really a coffee drinker. I can’t even finish a cup of coffee and often have to share it with my friends. But when something we used to have it and it is taken away from us, we gonna missed it. So I missed my half cup long black coffee!

Furthermore, I have some emotional relation to coffee.

This is also the reason why I missed my coffee. My late mother was a coffee drinker and oh! She took coffee like plain water. She started every morning with black coffee and she has a specific local brand (which Joe and I continuing using the same brand). Her best friend, Aunt Linda (my god-mom) will come to the house and drink it with her. She will have coffee for tea time and sometimes dinner.

A few days before she passed away, she asked if she could have her black coffee. The entire family was freaked out because her health was getting worse and I wasn’t around to witness whether she did have her coffee or not. Knowing my mom, she probably had it.

When I decode the emotional attachment towards coffee, what I see is, coffee makes my late mom happy. When she’s happy, I’m happy. I’m guessing, I carry that unconscious expectation when I’m with others especially with Joe. I know coffee makes her happy.

Is that necessary to make people happy at the expense of my health?

Here’s the answer. I’m a Projector Type human being. When my Generator or Manifesting Generator folks feel happy and satisfy, my world is colourful! I’m drinking it together with them because that’s what I did with my late mom.

Plus, have you seen Malaysian social culture? We love coffee places (from Mamak to Starbucks)! So it’s all social conditioning, which Projectors are deeply attuned to. And nothing is wrong with it. It’s a mundane life after all.

Since I’m on emotional healing through foods, this realisation helps me to be more aware. I may drink coffee after the 90 Days WildFit Challenge and back to the routine again… Or, I may not. That, I will leave it to my Splenic Authority (how I make every decision through my body intelligence). I guess we’ll find out soon!

If you like my post and the photo-stories, you can Buy Me a Coffee at https://ko-fi.com/roseosman. It will be spent on educations fees and books.  Thank you for supporting me on this journey.

Comment and share your thoughts with me if you like.

Human Design – Playfulness.

Current Mood: Playfulness.

When the unpaid job is to document my own emotional healing through food, this is where I go.

I wanted to make the eggs happy but it looks more confused and frightening, LOL…

I’m off refined sugar for 2 weeks now and off rice/grains/wheat for 10 days. I lost more inches than weight. Total weight loss so far is 3 kg (trying that for years). Remember that everything is about right timing.

Human Design taught me to honor my timing.

And now I’m doing this because my divine timing is giving me the flow. Despite the challenge on sugar craving, everything seems to be flowing effortless and gracefully. Looking forward to this week challenge.

I Am Grateful!

If you like my post and the photo-stories, you can Buy Me a Coffee at https://ko-fi.com/roseosman. It will be spent on educations fees and books.  Thank you for supporting me on this journey.

Comment and share your thoughts with me if you like.

Human Design – New Found Bread.

Good afternoon beautiful souls!

Photo taken by @joelai

Here’s something about food. I begin to take sugar out from my diet and I started with refined sugar first. That means, no usual bread. I love bread and my chiropractor, Dr Aileen suggested I try this German Bakery called Der Backmeister in Taman Tun. So today, after a road trip, we stopped by the bakery and voilà!

I asked for any bread that has no sugar. According to them, no sugar is used in the bread, hence most of their bread is sour and some are salty.

Intuitively, I picked the simplest one first; Plain Ciabatta. The taste is so damn good! I ate it plain in the car and by dinner… Well let’s just say I added a sunny side up on a toasted Ciabatta and enriched it with tomatoes and chopped onions. The taste? Heavenly!

Next mission, I want to do homemade Flaxseed Bread which I already bought the Flaxseed Meals and Black Sesame Powder. We’ll see when I have a mood to bake!

If you like my post and the photo-stories, you can Buy Me a Coffee at https://ko-fi.com/roseosman. It will be spent on educations fees and books.  Thank you for supporting me on this journey.

Comment and share your thoughts with me if you like.


A Projector’s Dream, Movement Between Dimensions.


Image Source

I’m a Projector who turns into Reflector when I sleep (Dream Rave)I’m also a Quad Right variable (Human Design Variable). To date, I have no further information about my Dream Rave or about my variable; e.g. how my dreams work when I sleep or how sensitive I become when I close my eyes. Despite knowing less information in this area, I continue observing my dreams and its pattern.

This morning I experienced something new…something really different. It’s not the dream but the process of how I get out of the dream. This going to be a long post and I treated it as a journal rather than as formal article. This going to be something to look back one day (for whatever reason). Here you go.

I was in deep sleep and I dreamed my parent’s old house in Penang Island. It felt all pleasant and good (old house usually gave me eerie dreams).

Outside of the dream, my body woke up because it heard a loud sound of a big bike in front of the house. I associated loud motorcycles’ engine with robbers (past trauma). And as a Splenic being (a person who has survival intelligence as her authority of life), my body is very instinctively alert, so that explained why it woke up.

But I was still dreaming at the time. At least my mind did. So, I didn’t open my eyes. A part of me aware that I’m not in a dream, that I’m lying on a bed 400 km away from the old house… but I don’t think my mind realise that.

I say that because my mind could not figure out the house I’m living right now; I don’t remember where I am, and I couldn’t ‘see’ the actual house I’m living through my inner vision. But deep inside I know I live here. With my eyes still close, I tried to recall my current house. But all I saw was the old house. I tried to look outside, and I saw the old road in front of the house.

I was like “oh shit!”. I forced to remember but fail. I have this feeling that I can get disoriented if I open my eyes when my mind still not here. So, I keep my eyes close and gently let the mind takes in the information from the body. I know it will remember when it gets what the body is feeling. It will remember when the mind aligns with the body, so to speak.

Slowly the first thing I saw and felt is the bedroom. Then the living hall. I could see the old house living hall slowly disappeared and was replaced with the current living hall. Then the door opened, I still see the old road but the garden started to emerge, then the porch and the old road slowly faded away. At last, I remember where I am. I finally felt everything about the house. And I opened my eyes; fully awake from the dream.

 Front garden

Image Source

The Channel of Abstraction – A design of Mental Activity Mixed with Clarity.

As usual, I’m processing the experience by reflecting the past. With Gate 64 (Confusion and pressure to resolve the past) in my conscious design and Gate 47 (Realisation), this is what I had in mind.

What happened here was my body woke up because it thought there might be a robbery happened in the neighbourhood. Every single time I heard loud engine from a motorcycle, I woke up. Having a Splenic Intelligence as my inner guide, it is its instinct to keep me safe in this dimension. The only difference this time was my mind was still sleeping, therefore it still experiencing the dream dimension.

Somehow, I could observe things that happened. I believe the observation comes from my Awareness; something beyond the mind and body.

Something to think about… for fun.

When we experience sleep paralysis, it is the body that still sleeping, and the mind wakes up first. In this case, was it the reverse of sleep paralysis? Is this like Lucid Dream? Tell me what do you think? I never had Lucid Dream, therefore I don’t know how lucid dream works.

We could argue that maybe the mind keeps thinking about the dream, therefore it seems real. But remember that I could not recall any memory of the current house or where I am except that I’m aware I live in a different house.

Fascinating isn’t it? If our mind experience past, present and future in one space, then what I just experienced this morning was movement between dimensions (dreams and earth) in one space with my body grounded in the present moment. And I didn’t get the panic feeling like sleep paralysis.

And the fact that I dreamed something pleasant in my deep sleep; that’s wonderful. Nevertheless, we have to consider the effects of the neutrinos and Universe programming (the Maia) through the planetary transit and sharing space with other auras especially when we are sleeping.

Let’s Talk About Human Design.

Yesterday someone asked my what do I do as a life coach, so I decided to share this knowledge that I used for my coaching, it’s call Human Design System. Here goes!

Image from http://www.jovianarchive.com

I bet my readers from the Western countries already open to the knowledge of Human Design. For us, in Asian, Human Design is quite new. If I didn’t hang out with my Western friends in the public forum like corefreedom.com, I wouldn’t know such knowledge.

Nevertheless, let’s talk about Human Design. Let’s go the way others didn’t go.

The Energetic Fingerprint.

We all know that our finger prints are different. But when people tell us we all are the same in sense of will power, motivation, behavior, thinking and reaction towards achieving success; we kinda settle for the idea. And because of it, we struggle to be like others. We want to fit in.

The problem about fitting in is, it pulls us away from being our Authentic Self. In order to fit in, one must be completely like the others. Otherwise, we fail to fit in! And we think our problem (when we can’t fit in) is because we are less than others. It’s sad to think that way. Not to mention the struggles and failures!

It all happen because we do not know our Authenticity.

Our finger prints are our Authenticity. We cannot alter it. But finger prints are physical manifestation of our Authentic Self. What about non-physical authenticity? How do we know our differences?

Do You Know Your Authenticity Self?

I’ve been searching for my authenticity for years. First, I know that I’m an Empath. But how I define Empath, energetically? How does Empath actually look like energetically? Then I discovered that I’m intuitive. Which part of me can defined that?

Thanks to Human Design, which I discovered in 2013, lay out a blueprint of my energetic designs. In that chart, I know what I am, what’s my domain personality, how my energy body flows, where it should go, what I shouldn’t do (it is all energetically speaking) and what are my roles in this world? It tells me why I am here and what I can do to live my life to the fullest?

Because of Human Design, I know the Empath trait in me, I found out why I’m intuitive. And I also came to acknowledge why people think I’m kinda annoyed and freak! And I don’t feel sorry for myself anymore. In fact, I’m loving every part of me, from the mind to the Soul.

So long story short, Human Design is a Science of Differentiation between human. The differences can be in many ways and all is shown in a simple Rave Chart (well! It’s not that simple anyway).

What Made Human Design System Mostly Accurate?

Human Design are the combination of modern and traditional knowledge, which consists of Astrology, the Kabbalah, the I`Ching (which the 64 gates come from) and the Chakra System. The part where the modern science came in is the reading of the Genetic Code. You can read more of the explanation in the Internet.

As a human being, we are very complex creature. There is no simple way to explain our being without combination from all aspects including the inner aspect like the genetic codons, the energy body like the aura and the Universe energy like the impact of planets’ energy on us. So, Human Design is a very complex system and yet, it reveals the simplicity of knowing our vessel (the body and its energy) and our Inner Self.

What Human Design Can Tell Us?

If you get your FREE Rave Chart at http://www.jovianarchive.com, you’ll discover basic information about your Type, Profile, Not-Self Theme (in the other words, your dominant setback), Definition, Incarnation Cross and the most important part is your Authority.

Beyond the basic information, you have extra information from the whole chart and it is complex. The chart doesn’t explain everything in detail. You can either read and discover the information through the internet or you can get experts who knows Human Design to explain the chart for you.

Around the whole charts, Human Design can explain two main things about your entire energy system:

  1. The Openness centers. We called it Undefined Centers. These are the centers where you unconsciously live as Not-Self (the conditioned self).
  2. The Defined centers. These are your Authentic energy. You have the access to the energy around the clock. However, we normally unaware of our Define centers because our Openness centers are more overwhelming.

According to this finding, if we don’t know this knowledge, we might life our whole life through the conditioned self and thinking that’s who we are!

But is knowing this important?

It depends.

  1. People who are successful, doesn’t really go and find out their Human Design. That is because they already live their Authenticity Self in the first place. Human Design is just a platform that provides us the structured information about our Authenticity.
  2. If you are a Projector, it is essential that you learn about your signature. For some reasons, Projectors are those who always live as somebody else, they are the failures ones and they get sick before the age of 40s (I got sick by age 32).
  3. If you are the Manifestor, you should know how to control your thoughts.

The rest, I feel it is important for you to know who you are. What you will do with the information is up to you.

Is This What I Am? Does This Design Change from Time to Time?

This is your energetic signature. Just like your finger prints, it doesn’t change until you die (I was looking for politer word but naaah!). It says that if you experience Near Death or if you practice meditation for more than 30 years, it might change. But there’s not many information to explain in detail. So intuitively, I feel that the changes might happen on the gates.

Will You Like Your Design?

This is funny. The first time I came to know that I’m a Projector, I feel so down and frustrated. Hey! I run a business. I have a lot of ideas how to be successful. But Human Design says, I have to wait for the invitation! How could I wait?! I was screaming inside my head and I tried to convince myself that whatever Human Design was saying is a total crap!

Not long after that I found another article says that I need to sleep alone! I was having difficulties sleeping alone because I was afraid of darkness. I had nightmares! The first few weeks, knowing Human Design is a mood killer.

Then I saw the beauty in it. The clarity of Who I Am. The understanding of my flow and why I always imitate others. And I fall in love.

What is The Most Precious Information I Found About Myself?

All pieces of information are important for you. In my case, the most precious is knowing I’m on the right path. I started Your Personal Motivator coaching service because I love to help people. Turn out my chart revealed that would be an ideal path for me. Other than that, would be knowing my intuition channel, which lies in gate 57. And the chart also explain why I can see patterns and tap into insightful knowledge and how to share it with the world.

If you ever find out your Human Design, pay attention to the Strategy and Authority first. Live by that Design!

Lesson of Letting Go from the Cats – Our Zen Masters

This is a story that happened about 2 months ago.

“Adopter wants to take Oren tonight instead of tomorrow. I can tell you how attachment feels like. It makes my heart feel heavy to let go.
Sleepy Bright Cat.jpg
So let’s talk about attachment. We build this feeling everyday to people we love, to our pets, to our materials. Is this love? This is human love. There is a thin line between love and the urge to possess. Attachment that turns into possession is one form of suffering.

Attachment serve its purposes to connect us, at least to average human who have not yet enlighten (including me). And we know better. When we couldn’t let go; we suffer.

At first I said no to adoption tonight and thinking that I do better tomorrow. Then I took a moment to understand this feeling better. Oren, Cerah (means Bright) and Melancholy (these are the cats names) are the expression of Consciousness. If you like to relate to God, they are a fragment of God’s essence of Love. Through them we can see how Life being playful, how life creates balance and so much more to learn. Most important is; through them we get to see ourselves better.
Hungry Curious Cat.jpg
Attachment happens. We are just human. What we can do best is acknowledge the attachments. And when time comes to let go; do it with Love so suffering don’t consume our heart and Soul.

So I already gave my kisses to Oren. And I asked the mama cat (Melancholy) and Cerah to be ready to let go. Surprisingly Melancholy walked us to the gate and when Oren left, she walked back to Cerah.
Playful Cat.jpg
This Love feels like heaven. Eckhart Tolle was right. They are great Zen Masters. We are blessed to host them even just for a while. To our adopters, Thank you.”

Thank you for letting me put the words here.
Good night.

p/s : If you like my post and the photo-stories, would you buy me a coffee? Click this link: http://ko-fi.com/roseosman. It will be spent on educations fees and books.  Thank you for supporting me on this journey.

Morning Rain

Humanity are now have access to all spectrum of emotions. It’s not we don’t feel emotions before. We do. But now we have access to it with Awareness. We are experiencing our emotions from a different level of consciousness.

In the process, pain felt more intense. So does Peace. Do know that if we feel pain and suffering inside of us, we also could feel Peace and Love within us.

Universe has its way to help human going through suffering, only when they are willing to embrace the presence moment. Use rainy day to understand your emotions. Rain is water, so does emotions. Let the Universe frequency helps you become conscious of your Self.

Feel your emotions wherever you are. Even if rainy days make you grumpy and angry, feels it. I’m not guiding you to be positive. I’m guiding you to become aware of your emotional intelligence.

Breathe and be alive from within.

Anyway, this is my kind of morning. I Love morning rain so far. It makes me feel peace, joyful and creative.