Turning Hopelessness Into Hope

Turning Hopelessness Into Hope

by Cha~zay, Ph.d., C.H.

I just heard the most awful sound of something crashing into the scaffolding right outside of my window. Whatever it was crashed right into the concrete below,” she said with a trembling voice. “What was it?” I asked in anticipation. “I walked outside to look and there laid the smashed body of a woman with her head splattered all over the concrete.”

Many don’t want to talk about suicide for various fears and misconceptions that talking about this darkest of dark deeds remains misunderstood and avoided at all costs. Many also falsely believe that talking about it will actually instigate and encourage it.

Nothing could be farther from the truth. By taking the ostrich approach and sticking your head in the sand pretending that hopelessness doesn’t exist you are not only avoiding the issue but you are actually aiding in making the problem worse.

As a trained grief and suicide hotline counselor let me assure you that being able to provide a safe space for others to talk about their darkest fears and heaviest pressures is the very thing that will actually prevent them from giving in to their hopelessness. Yes, you can be that important to those around you, whether a stranger or a friend.

However, I am not writing this article to write about suicide but to give you a flicker of hope and encourage you to be that same flicker of inspiration and hope to those around you. It’s easier and simpler than you think.

What You Can Do

One of the best ways to help the hopeless is to stop pretending that you are not affected. Take your head out of the clouds and come back to Earth and reality and realize that we are all responsible for each other.

Here are some additional ways you can turn into a flame of hope for those around you:

Acknowledgement and Ignorance: Everyone goes through life and at one point or another becomes hopeless to varying degrees. Especially now that the energies of the world are incredibly intense, thoughts of giving up and utter hopelessness are rampant. Ignoring this for yourself and those who try to reach out to you will not make the pressure go away. Talk about it and make yourself available to others who need to talk about it. When you know someone is in this space, acknowledge the dark space they’re in and do your best to hold a safe space for them.

Judgment and Forgiveness: If you find yourself judging even this article or the woman who jumped off the 18th floor from this San Francisco apartment complex last night, then know that the energy of your judgment is exactly a part of this problem we are facing together. Judgment is what gets people to a place of hopelessness, whether it is self judgment or judgment from others. People long to know that they are enough just the way they are, that they are not judged for living, loving, choosing the things they choose and for screwing up royally from time to time. We can’t even control the hair on our very head, at least I can’t, so how then do we expect to control another human being? What futility and waste of energy. So give it up already. Instead exercise forgiveness, compassion and empathy for yourself and those around you.

Love and Kindness: People are very confused these days about what love is and isn’t. Let me make this simple. Kindness is love in action. You can be a walking love machine, literally, by exercising constant kindness to not only yourself but also those around you. This includes animals, bugs and insects, plants and our planet. Kindness can be as simple as a sincere smile, as opposed to a forced, fake one. And as simple as a gentle look that says: “I see you. You matter. I care.”

Plant Seeds of Blessings: Look into someone’s eyes for 3-5 seconds as you pass them by while saying “I bless you.” It works miracles, literally! Don’t shove the responsibility of blessing another human being onto God by saying “God bless you.” YOU do it! You take the responsibility of blessing those around you. Why? Because you are a manifestation and our light source flows through you as much as it flows through everyone else. So don’t hand the responsibility over to anyone else, there is no one else besides you anyway. Know with certainty that you have all the tools to bless another ones’ life.

As a final note, please know that 92% of all people who commit suicide do have some type of chemical imbalance and/or are taking some type of medication. If you feel suicidal please call 1-800-SUICIDE or work with your therapist to get the help you need. Make sure that you take care of your brain by giving it the Omega 3s and other nutrition that it needs to operate at its best.

Biography: Dr. Cha~zay is a metaphysician, international life coach and certified hypnotist. She is a Reverend, certified and trained grief and suicide hotline counselor, transcendental dowser and Reiki master. She is the founder of a love forum community, http://corefreedom.com/


Note: Thank you Dr. Cha~zay for the nicely written article and for the permission given to re-post the article in this blog.

Lessons From The Ants

I was having my breakfast and I saw a small hole on the floor right next to my foot. I knew the hole is a door to the ants. They always come out through the hole whenever pieces of foods fall on the floor. Even tiny pieces of food will attract them to come out.

While looking down at the floor, an idea came into my mind. I grab a tiny piece of the food and place it on the floor. Then I started to clock the time and told myself “let’s see what the ants can teach us”.

  • In less than 5 second, an ant came out through the hole and went right to the food. Then it walked back to the surface of the hole and the second ant came out through the hole. Together they rushed to the food.
  • In less than 10 seconds, more than 5 ants came out and their sizes were bigger than the first ant.
  • In less than 10 minutes, the food was no longer on the floor, so does the ants.

Beautiful! I told myself. What are even more beautiful were the lessons they taught me yesterday. I’m going to share it with you and here are the lessons:

  1. When you see an opportunity, do not wait to grab the opportunity and never wait for the opportunity to come closer. The first ant took less than 5 seconds to get to the food.
  2. Sometimes in life you can never do things alone. Get help from the right people. The first ant got help from the second ant and the rest of the ants.
  3. Always work as team. Things get to be done faster when you work as a team.
    (Note: In terms of spirituality, consider these as your team: your mind, emotions, body and soul. Always make sure they are heading to the same direction as your purposes).

Here’s the picture of the team. Happy Learning to all of us!

Lessons to Learn From Ants

Lessons to Learn From Ants

Signs That You Are Blessed

Blessing is all over the earth and the sky. It’s infinite and countless. It’s unconditional love given by God through His entire creation in the universe. If you look with open heart and open mind, you will notice the blessing in your life. Here are some of situations and circumstances in our lives that appear to tell us “You Have Been Blessed and loved”.

1. Little are many
Whenever you and your life touch by the blessing, little or many is no longer appear as quantity. Instead they appear as abundance. Little or many seems as ONE instead of two separate entities. For example, the food that you eat seems little in portion but not to your body and soul. Another example is when you could spend a lot from the little money you have earned.

The Bird and Her Nest

The Bird and Her Nest

2. Nature get closer to you
Whenever blessing is part of you and your life, nature will give their love to you in the obvious way. The best example is when birds build a nest under your tree or in your yard. Look at it with our common sense, who would build a home in a place that is not safe? Birds and other animals know this. They just enjoy the love and blessing that you have.

3. More than 24 hours. 
All of us have been given 24 hours every day. The one with the blessing get to do many precious and productive tasks in those 24 hours. They get to do it with joy and love. In fact they feel that they have more than 24 hours in a day.
The one without blessing get to do it with worries, unnecessary pressure and most of the time they have not achieve much in 24 hours. Their companion is complaint and whining. 24 hours seems so little to achieve even a small goal.

4. Rescue is an inch distance
No doubt that sometimes you have to go through hard time in life but it can tell you whether blessing is given to you or otherwise. In situation like this, when rescue seems to appear sooner than you thought, take it as a sign of blessing is with you. One of the examples is when the money you have is not enough to spend until your next pay check and you are very much need an extra money. Soon enough, rescues appear in many ways. Look at it with an open mind, sometimes the rescue may not appear as the extra money that you need. It may appear in many ways such as free meals, opportunity to earn money from freelancing tasks or even better, someone appear to pay the money that he have owed you.

Rescue (for example an extra money) sometimes appear when you need it

Rescue (for example an extra money) sometimes appear when you need it

5. Troubles at the right time.
Do you believe that everything happen when the timing is right? People who are blessed see it this way. Those without bless see it as plainly trouble. One of the incidents I remembered the most is when my soul mate’s car broke down right in front of the workshop instead of the highway or in the middle of the road. It was not just that, the workshop that the car stopped and ‘died’ is the cheapest workshop in the area. No tow needed. Money spent on the incident was lesser than we expected.

We are all entitling for blessing and there are ways to earn it. One of the way is to give gratitude as many as we can. Gratitude is like a door for blessing to enter. The other way is to live with unconditional love because blessing is part of unconditional love. Seek and you will find. Give and you will get.

What is Affirmation Program?

In this simple article, I would love to explain why I have added affirmation writing as part of the healing programs. Here are the explanations:

1. Every creation is happening NOW, not in the past and not in the future but it happens NOW.

2. Every creation begins through these ways:

  • The power of our thoughts and imaginations (Mind)
  • The power of our emotions
  • The power of our words.

3. What we have in our minds and emotions, we always affirm it through our words.

4. As we speak (affirm), we create.

5. As we create, God, through His wonderful creation, The Universe will bring the creation into our lives accordingly.

Basically creation of our lives always comes from our mind, emotions and our own words. It is as simple as speak good words and good things will come into our lives. So with the negative words and it happen in the same process.

Affirmation Writing Is Part of Our Healing and Motivation Programs

Affirmation Writing Is Part of Our Healing and Motivation Programs

How Affirmation Helps?

Affirmation is a specific, constructive and powerful words that build to suits your need; mentally, emotionally and spiritually. When a person read the affirmation, he is creating the life wholly. When a person read the affirmation repeatedly, he is storing the powerful words into his conscious and subconscious mind.

The fastest result is getting your mind, emotion and words work in loving and positively powerful ways. Affirmations create powerful beliefs in your system entirely (We don’t get what we want but we get want we belief – Oprah). The long term result is self transformation that leads to meaningful and healthy life.

Affirmation writing is powerful and yet it can be tricky too. Just like mantras (doa) and prayers, wrongful wishes can lead to inconvenience results. Although some affirmation sounds positive enough to everyone but it may not suits the person need at that particular level. Hence, I would suggest that you get a right person to help you create powerful affirmation in transform your life entirely. In healing and health, affirmations create powerful result to the healing system.

If you interested in transform your life, health, relationship and anything you desire, we could write a powerful affirmation for you. For more information, please contact us via our email. Thank you.

Affirmation Writing is Powerful in Creating Life Entirely

Affirmation Writing is Powerful in Creating Life Entirely

Reiki Have Found Me

In the past two months, I’ve learned many new knowledge especially on emotion, mind and physical healing. I’ve learned that in the world where we live, there are many more things live with us. I’ve learned that the world is ‘opening up’ and more similar circumstances will be experienced by many people regardless religions and race.

I took opportunity to learn a proper system of self healing and healing in energy so I could help people effectively and help myself effectively too. When I was looking for the right knowledge of this, Usui Reiki found me through a friend of mine (who is a Master Reiki). Without hesitation, I took the course and have obtained 2nd degree so far.

Get Your Emotion Burden Heal By Reiki Technique

Get Your Emotion Burden Heal By Reiki Technique

Reiki heals at the level of energy, wherever the energy is. Reiki not just provide healing for physical illness but also emotion. During this past two months journey, many people I’ve met have mentioned the natural of healing I have with me. I took their words and allow myself to discover my true-self. What I have seen and experiences are far greater than what I have expected. Since this is who I am now, I’m not going to waste it. Knowledge taste best when we practice it. Therefore, I’m going to do the same with the Reiki knowledge I have with me.

When I come back soon, my consultation will cover Emotional Healing for those who wants to be heal emotionally and effectively via Reiki. Physical healing can be done too but upon consultation only.

So far, I have gave Reiki healing to animals (my favourite; bird and fish…looking forward to heal cats and others), to few people I knew and proven their illness is reducing and to situations too.

Bottom line is, I have better healing system to work with and to use in helping people transform their energy, heal and build better life. So see you soon!

Healing Through Reiki

Healing Through Reiki

What Takes You So Long?

After my little confession in this blog, I have been away for healing process. I am still in the healing process and progress is there. Actually there are lots of progresses. Challenges too. I’m going to share with you one of the biggest progress I’ve made last week; my self-love.

After nearly two months in the battle with something inside me, I have less love towards myself. It didn’t mean I hurt myself with objects and create visible scars. When a person have less self-love, things like anger, frustration and fear can easily take over the person’s life. That was what happened to me. I was no longer a happy person. I could easily felt disturbed by small little things like unexplained energy and pain. Mostly I felt fear. Anger came later on. It was easy for me to throw my anger around. I was ‘ugly’.

For a person who always promotes love but not be able to live with love was torturing. That period of tortured have made me sick. Little that I know, I have invited new sickness like nausea and vomiting and also outgrowth whatever illness I already have in me.

Courage, always in YouSo one day I went to the hospital for the follow up. The Doctor was nice but as usual he was referring to my age. Medically, I was too young for the illness. With the ‘mumble mumble‘ about the age, my ears heard but my mind not. Something inside me caught my attention but it was not clear.

After the visit, I have to wait for the medicines in the pharmacy. While waiting, I asked myself silently;

“What have I done that my body have to take all the pain?”. This question put my emotion at rest. No ego. No guilt. No fear. No anger. Just plain wonder.

Then I heard my inner voice spoke to me;

“Your body knows what to do and how to heal. Trust them and love them. We are all with you”

We? Silence. Beautiful silence.

And I felt tears in my eyes. I knew that voice. It’s a same voice that used to speak to me not long ago. It’s my courage. With tears I smiled at myself again. Touched by the visit, I started to smile again to the world.

Before I go to bed that night, I asked again;

“What takes you so long?”

“We were there, waiting for you to give us some space to growth” 

And so I did. The moment I put fear, anger and some others negative emotions at rest, even for a seconds, love inside me have found its way to take up the space. I’m eternally grateful that I made positive progress in my healing.

Until to-date, I woke up feeling healthier than yesterday. I am still healing. I am still being challenged every day. I know it will not stop until I completely take over it with Love.

Good bye Anger. Good bye Fear…and Hello Love.

We All Have Self-Love

We All Have Self-Love

My Little Confession

Since I discover spirituality, I have fallen into an unknown zone where I discover my talent and gift.  This specific zone has offered me a new perspective in experiencing life. It was totally a whole new experience to me and it was fun in the beginning, but fun is over-rated. About two months ago, something bad had happened and it had changed my life since then.

In every unknown zone we step in, we will discover our true self, strengths, skills, talents and weaknesses. Basically, that’s how we growth and progress in life. From my experiences, any discovery is just a discovery. It will be written in our minds and our diaries but it just a discovery. What’s more important than discovery is how we live our lives after the discovery. It’s like a person who just discovered she had cancer and it is how she live her life that count. So discovery is just a discovery.

And I didn’t do what I was supposed to do after the discovery. I basically didn’t know how to live my life at this moment.

The reason I write this today is for good. After been advised by a friend, I agreed that people especially my readers, my clients, subscribers, followers and my friends should know what is happening to me. Standing on the title “motivator” didn’t make me a human with super motivation energy. I have to be honest to everyone about things that eaten up my life lately. Even thought I have aware what is happening to me but I failed to address it out properly. And because of that, I didn’t know how easy I fall into early stage of depression.

Why is this important for me and for you?

Those who have subscribed my newsletter would realize by now that I have slow down in sending them newsletters. The reason is simple, I coached subscribers via newsletter and I take coaching seriously.

A subscriber asked me, “How do you know what to write?”. It was a great question. Every month I will pick a subject based on my intuitions. Then I will plan the best coaching and method to share with my subscribers. When I write the newsletters, I gave my best positive energy and love through the writing. When subscribers read the newsletters, I’m hoping they get the energy and the teaching. My goal is to get subscribers feel the value of love and life. When they feel it, they would be able to adapt and apply it in life.

What I have gave as coaching in newsletters and what I’m going to give in future is purely with good intention – To help people live a better life and live with love. Good intention should come with love and positive energy. Sadly, I’m lacking of it right now. Even I still have few topics to coach; it won’t work without love and positive energy. So, that’s the reason why I choose to slow down on newsletters.

I may send newsletters but it would be a simple newsletters and e-books for the subscribers. I hope with these, I still keep the ball rolling.

A Confession

I promised a confession yesterday when I posted it my Facebook Page about my decision to slow down in coaching people. Circa two months ago, I saw, I heard and I felt a tragedy. A young girl, who I never met in my life consciously, appeared in my space in the middle of a night and screamed for help. The emotion she brought with her was very heavy, painful and fear. The waves of energy that came onto me that night were big. The images, the screaming and the emotion pains have pulled me into the darkness. Struggling between the images and my own rational thoughts, I was fighting to know what is happening at that moment. Of course, I have no clue what was going on except to follow my intuitions but there was nothing I could do to change her mind. What had happened later was a tragedy for her and her family…and an imprinted of many negative things in my mind. So that’s my theory, an imprinted of unfortunate tragedy that came together with a discovery of gifted soul and mind.

What had happened to me affect my entire being indirectly. At first I was struggling to catch some lights. It was no fun to live in the darkness. When I saved, the trauma was still there. After few healing process, I learned to let it go. However, I didn’t realize that I started to feel constant fear towards many things and this have affect my physical health indirectly too. Slowly, I started to feel emotionally wounded because I felt that I’m losing myself. I have asked for many help including physicians and spiritual gurus but it didn’t entirely solve my whole problem. I’m still lost.

A friend who advised me to take time-out asked me to let-it-go. My biggest problem is I do not know what else to let-it-go. I have concluded that the tragedy was long gone and I have released the hook during the healing process. So what is my actual problem? All I know that my focus on my life has slowly disappeared. My passions in motivation slowly faded away too. I knew the tragedy was the beginning to all this but things that came along the way that makes it worst. Everything seems to be tangled.

And I feel that I have no progress…in life.

What’s The Conclusion?

In order to help people, I must first help myself to heal…completely. This is to avoid spreading the negative energy around. What had happened to me may happen to many people who are in this ‘motivation‘ and ‘self-help’ business. So it is normal to feel negative and depress but it’s my responsibility to give people the best positive motivation. And for that, I have to give myself the best positive motivation first.

With help from friends and healers, I’m getting better than yesterday, a lot better than last week and last months. I’m eternally grateful with the healing. Even though it’s not 100% healing but I am healing and I am walking towards a healthy life again. I will keep updates about it through my blog and Facebook Page.

Everyone Has Their Rainy and Stormy Days

Everyone Has Their Rainy and Stormy Days

I gave myself certain period of time to heal completely. I will document my progress and technique of healing and cleansing so one day it could be uses to help people who fall into the same situation or tragedy. What had happened makes me realize that it is so easy to fall into depression and without help, it might ruin our lives.

Let’s consider this a stormy period in my business and my life. When it’s over, I will come out and play under the sunshine again. Thank you to everyone who has sent and who are sending me healing rays, lights and love. And thank you to my friends, family, subscribers and followers who are still walking with me throughout my journey.

A Word Can Change Life

Do you know a word can change your life and a word can make your life turn upside down? We creating our lives through the words we speak, the thoughts we think, the emotions we feel and the action we give right now. Simple isn’t it? However, how many of us aware what’s coming out from our lips? I wasn’t aware either and because of it, my life was turning upside down and it totally affects my health. So here’s the story.

Harmony and Sensitivity, two straight words and everyone know the meaning. These words are the words I used to explain to people about the motivation business I’m doing. People always asked what makes I quit my logistic job and work in the line of motivation? My answer is always “It’s my gift. My purpose lies here”. Then people started to ask if I have psychologist background to conduct motivation session. It always stop me right there because I don’t do entirely psychology stuff but somehow I’ll be able to see their situation and their problems from different perspectives. So how do I do that?

Choose The Right Words To Explain Who You Are

Choose The Right Words To Explain Who You Are

To make them understand easier, I choose the word “sensitivity towards emotion”. It sounds right isn’t it? I wasn’t aware that this word brought madness and tragedy into my life. When I said ‘sensitive’, my subconscious mind makes everything became sensitive to me. It was madness to feel everything around you. It just took me a night out of someone else tragedy to fall sick emotionally, and then physically. Later on it affects my spirituality too.

It took me more than a week to figure out the root of the madness. I realized that sensitivity was outrageous. It completely separates me from being normal and healthy human. Once I figured out the root of the madness, I seek help from my healer. With her help, I rephrased and re-creating myself spiritually and emotionally. This time, I choose “I am harmony” and over the time, it help heals me physically too.

We all create as we speak. What we speak, what we think, what we feel, we are creating it. Soon the words we said moments ago will appear in our lives for real. This is the reason why we should speak positive and loving words. It’s not easy as I wrote it and it takes practice to speak only positive and loving words. The powerful words of “I am” and “You are” should be tied together with positive words and loves. Practice small every day so you could change your life tomorrow.

That’s the story between Harmony and Sensitivity. It just a word that differentiates what is coming into my life and what is not. So choose your word with wisdom especially when you say “I am….”

I Am Harmony

I Am Harmony

Why Do These When We Get Angry?

Yes we do get angry. We are just human. Many people gives many methods to reduce the anger when it exploded but these fives are the common ones. But do you know why we are encouraged do these when we get angry? There are reasons why it works.

1) Wash our hands with running water.
It is a symbolic act of washing out negative energy. It is just as same as we wash our hands before we eat just to get rid of the dirt and germs.

Wash Your Face When You Get Angry

2) Wash our face with running water.
Anger is heat. Try pour water on a heat pan and you will get smokes rise upward. That’s how we change the angry energy. Turn it into something light so it will get out from our body. And guess what, our head are the easiest exit.

3) Muslim was taught to perform ‘Wudhuk’ when they get angry.
Our bodies contain 70% of water, the cooling energy in our lives. What will happen when water meet water? Have you seen two drops of water meet each other? They combine and get bigger. Water doesn’t push water away. The symbolic act helps the water in our bodies to combine with the water from the nature. The cooling energy gets bigger and reduces the heat energy.

4) Walk or stand barefoot on the soil.
We came from the soil and the soil where we return. Another simple act of getting back to the nature for the healing.

5) Standing, Sitting and Lying Down Method.
When we get angry while we are standing, sit down immediately and if it doesn’t reduce the anger, lie down completely. It’s a symbolic stage of getting our bodies nearer to the force of gravity. Remember that heat rise upwards; we go the opposite, which is downwards. Gravity will hold us firmly to the ground and back to our nature again for the healing.

All these acts show us that at the vulnerable moments of our lives, nature is always there for us to get help and restore our energies back. God didn’t create nature for nothing, so use them to reduce our anger, anytime and anywhere.

Breaking Up – Why and The Healing.


Breaking up from a relationship is painful. What are the best things can be done to heal? Should we try to get back together? Can love growth again after brake up?


Yes breaking up is painful but sometimes it could be just the surface of the emotion. Not all breaks up cases are painful to the three elements (mind, emotion and soul). Understand that relationship is not just physical and emotion connection between two people but also soul connection between two souls. It hurts for the physical and emotional being when two people are breaking up but it may not hurt the soul being. This however, depends on the reason for breaking up.

Sometimes break up helps to restore the harmony between two souls. When the relationship is creating gap and the only things that filling the gap is argument, hate, anger, frustration, then break up probably the good thing to do.

If one of the soul change his/her course of love, break up is the best thing to save self from prolonged pain

If one of the soul change his/her course of love, break up is the best thing to save self from prolonged pain

First we have to understand why we are breaking up and what can be the goodness we get from it. I experienced a case where a couple who were married for two years find themselves cursing each other every day and creating more agony than happiness. When both of them choose not to give up their ego and growth love in their marriage, break up is the only way to save their emotions and friendship. However, they remained for another year and they end up divorced in the ugliest way. The result was a war between these two souls. It takes them years to forgive each other. They could save their souls from the pain if they allow breaks up when they are still in state of respect to each other. This is the goodness that many people missed when they see break up is bad decision to make.

My advice is not to let both souls (you and him) go to that path of anger and hate. If a couple believe that happiness and love is still in the relation, then work something out to growth the love back. Love and happiness is not just a belief. It’s a work, progress and action.

Constructive Solution:

Should we try to get back together?

This will always be the best thing to do but with a condition: both of you must let go the ego and the past first. These two elements could block your love from growing again. Love taste best when both couple living in NOW moments and not the past.

Can love growth again after brake up? 

Loves always growth. Love is already in us. If we allow it to growth, it wills growth. Forgiveness is the best act that helps love growth. Forgive yourself for the things that happened. Forgive him for the things that happened. Then move on and love again.

What are the best things can be done to heal? 

  1. Forgive.
  2. Stay in the state of love especially to yourself. Give love to all the things around you and you will get love back. This act is to avoid anger, hate and despair taking over your emotion.
  3. Do things you never have chances to do before. Find yourself back from the activities you desire to do.
  4. Belief that only time, love and your effort to heal will heal you.
Break up not always a bad decision. Sometimes break up is the best thing to save self from prolonged pain. See the whole situation in the bigger picture and decide if break up is good or bad for both souls. That would help both souls stay connect and respect each other. Most important it save self from anger and hate.


If you have problems and you don’t have the solution, ask Ladyroses for help.